8 Reasons Your Relationship with Your Teen Isn't Working...
and what you can do about it.
4 Reasons You Need to Watch This Masterclass
You don’t know who your teen’s becoming.
The parenting skills you mastered before aren't working with your teen. You're grasping to find leverage and maintain authority and get your teen in line before this gets worse, but nothing is working.
Your teen is unmotivated and failing.
You're at your wits end trying to get your teen to take responsibility for showing up and handing in assignments. They won't even try or accept help, and your dreams for their future are crumbling.
Your teen doesn’t care about consequences.
You’ve tried tough love, soft love, taking their phone and gaming and nothing works to change their behaviour. You’re worried if you don’t find a leverage point to gain control, you’ll be getting a call from police, or worse.
Your teen's chasing unhealthy relationships.
You’ve raised your teen in a loving home with solid values yet they continue to. Your lecturing, forbidding, and grounding, is only driving them further away and you’re scared you won’t get them back before it’s too late.
What you'll learn...
Based on my own experience as an angry, defensive teen, then raising two sons, and working with thousands of parents of teens for 16 years, I'm sharing 8 Reasons Your Relationship With Your Teen Isn't Working and What You Can Do About It to help you...
Understand your teen’s brain.
Knowing how your teen’s brain is changing, what they ACTUALLY want from you and how to say ask without nagging, reminding or yelling, lowers conflict and improves communication.
Keep your teen safe without tighter controls.
Strict environments create better liars, leading to more of what you don't want. Empowering your teen to develop their own critical thinking requires less telling and more talking, being curious, not critical.
Helping your teen develop healthy relationships.
Teens are quickly drawn to people and relationships who meet their emotional needs and are desperate to fit in. That leaves them vulnerable to other's agendas without a solid identity and sense of belonging at home.
Using consequences to connect, not control.
Punishment creates more defiance and disrespect, setting up a pissing match between you and your teen. Lasting behaviour change is achieved through meaningful consequences and connection.
Building your teen's internal motivation.
No amount of outward pressure is going to get your teen going because that only reinforces your teen's belief they already ARE a failure. Become their ally to help them build heathy strategies to define success on their terms.
Support your teen through struggles without rescuing or fixing.
Big emotions, let alone conflict, may feel scary because of your childhood. Stifling your teen before they feel heard increases angry outbursts and 'the tone'. Get phrases to stay in the conversation and support connection and emotional regulation.
Meet Aly Pain, CPCC, ORSCC
Growing up, Aly was the smart, fun girl on the outside and a frantic, anxious mess on the inside. She spent years healing the pain of dysfunctional family relationships, including eating disorders and a suicide attempt, to break the cycle raising her own teen boys.
In 2006, Aly returned to school to further develop her skills by becoming a Certified Life Coach and Certified Relationship Systems Coach - one of only 70 people in Canada to hold both designations.
Aly's passion is empowering parents to build healthy, respectful relationships with their teens without giving up or giving up, even if they've tried everything and are at their wits end. She's built an online audience of over 560K followers and has been featured in the New York Post, ABC Nightly News and the Rachael Ray Show.
Today, Aly lives in the Okanagan valley in BC, Canada and enjoys dancing in Zumba classes, doing daily yoga, paddle boarding, hiking and snowshoeing. She enjoys close relationships with her 2 incredible sons, now 19 and 21.